DO YOU HAVE TROUBLE GETTING YOUR CHILD TO DO WHAT YOU ASK?
Here's a simple fix!
It is helpful to offer your child a choice between good options, especially if they are out of sorts. However, they must be choices with which you agree. Don't speak to them as if they have a choice when they don't. For example, don't say, "Let's get your coat on, ok"? Saying it like that sounds like you are giving them a choice. It is perfectly fine to give your child an order. You are the boss. You have the authority. Just say, "Put your coat on now, please."
Stop saying, "OK?" with a question mark. Instructions should be statements and end with a period. Try it. Say it in a little firmer tone than the everyday conversational one you use.
Family physician, psychologist and author Leondard Sax
Sax offers a scenario in which parents and a 6-year-old child, who had a sore throat, came into his office. When he said, “Next I’m going to take a look at your throat,” the mother asked for the child's permission, saying, “Do you mind if the doctor looks in your throat for just a second, honey? Afterward we can go and get some ice cream.”
That led to the child refusing to have the doctor look in her throat to do the strep test and the child having to be restrained to get the test accomplished.
“It’s not a question,” Sax said. “It’s a sentence: ‘Open up and say, 'Ahh.'' Parents are incapable of speaking to their children in a sentence that ends in a period,” he said. “Every sentence ends in a question mark.”
It may take awhile to break the habit of saying, "OK?", but it will be worth it.
Another way to accomplish the same end is to have them say, "OK, Mommy". Try it. Say, "Put your coat on please. Say, "OK, Mommy!" You model what they should say, and be sure to say it in a happy, enthusiastic tone of voice!